How might using you-messages escalate a problem?

Using you-messages puts the blame on the other person which more than likely will escalate the problem. but if you were to use i-statements such as using "I feel upset because this, this, and this" but don't use the word you in the statement because it wouls still be blaming the other person. 

Habit 1: be proactive  habit 2: begin with the end in mind  habit 3: put first things first  habit 4: think win-win  habit 5: seek first to understand, then to be understood  habit 6: synergize  habit 7: sharpen the saw 

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